I have given up single-life and have moved to a shared apartment - I like it there! - baby Life doesn't get more real than having a newborn at home. (Carol Burnett)Ī conscience is like a baby. Having a baby is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head. (Leo Burke)īecoming a father is easy enough, but being one can be very rough. People who say, they sleep like a baby, usually don't have one. Starting today, it is me who'll decide when we get up! - baby If your baby is "beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time", you are the grandma! (Teresa Bloomingdale)īabies are always more trouble than you thought - and more wonderful. but just a little toothless smile and mummy and daddy are happy! They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannise their teachers (Sokrates). The hardest part of raising a child is having to stick to all these rules yourself! (unknown)Ĭhildren nowadays are tyrants. Once you sign on to be a mother, that's the only shift they offer! (Jodi Picoult) The only things kids wear out faster than their shoes are their parents. Now, I have six children and no theories. (Bruce Lansky)īefore I got married I had six theories about raising children. When your second baby drops her pacifier, you tell the dog: 'Fetch!'. When your first baby drops her pacifier, you sterilize it. How much patience you have, for instance. (unknown)įamilies with babies and families without babies are sorry for each other. The art of being a parent is to sleep when baby is not looking. (Shannon Fife)Ī father is someone who carries pictures where his money used to be. Insomnia: A contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. The child departs, leaving the house so silent you think you are going mad. (Milwaukee Journal)Ī child enters your home and for the next twenty years makes so much noise you can hardly stand it. A perfect example of minority rule is a baby in the house.
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